Divorce lawyers are the most reviled species of attorney. Anyone who finds themselves going though a divorce is already on an emotional roller coaster. Bad divorce lawyers will try and keep those emotions and all that anger brewing for as long as possible because like all lawyers, an divorce lawyer is paid hourly. When emotions are aroused it is harder to make concessions quickly. A pressing concern for any one seeking a good divorce lawyer is how to make the encounter as painless as possible. One highly efficient solution is to consult a mediator.
A mediator can serve to shorten the divorce proceeding because a mediator is in a position that a divorce lawyer is not: a mediator must maintain complete neutrality. While the two litigants in the divorce proceeding hire their own divorce lawyers, mediators work for both sides to attempt to reach a fair and equitable settlement. A mediator may be in a position to offer a compromise that would be construed as a sign of weakness if offered by a divorce lawyer. In many cases, neither of the divorce lawyers would want to be seen by their client or by opposing counsel as giving something up in the fight that may involve the couple’s assets or the rights to child care and visitation.
A divorce involving children may present a strong motive for staying away from divorce lawyers and leaning more heavily on a mediator. Mediators who have experience dealing with divorces where child custody is at stake may be able to advocate for the child better than a divorce lawyer who is hired by the parent. This may be the case because the divorce lawyer has an obligation only to the client by whom the lawyer was hired. lawyers especially stringent upon the rights of his or her client may end up being harming the children involved in the divorce by the proceedings more than is necessary.
There is also evidence that divorcing couple who choose not to involve lawyers until absolutely needed may have less complicated divorces. Those opting to mediate the divorces through an impartial party are more likely to derive satisfaction from the process and results, complete the divorce faster and at a lower cost, and are less likely to have to return to court in order to resolve further arguments. In many states, the only time that courts require an lawyer become involved in divorce proceedings is to draw up papers to complete the process and legalize the divorce.
Utilizing a mediator in divorce proceedings effectively and minimizing the presence of lawyers, however, have one obstacle. Both parties must agree to the mediation. If one of the parties wants to exact revenge on the other, or does not want to involve a mediator then the process is doomed to failure. If the two sides cannot set aside the reasons for the divorce in the first place then no divorce lawyer or mediator can make a split any more amicable or less painful for the parties involved.


